Among those very few things that I got with me from Romania, I had one badge of “innovation”. Today I saw the same badge on a desk near mine… at leaving from work it was opened and I closed it back in, but it didn’t cross my mind to put it “inside”. This evening I lost it. I saw I didn’t have it when I got down from the tram at home. It may have fallen when I switched the bag on the chair, from the right side to the left side… or who knows. Now I may just have to integrate it and learn to live without it.
In a different train of thoughts, apparently, I should really learn how to let go of people. In the spiritual-emotional way. Especially to my ex-boyfriends.. which are married now. Or them to me. It’s just that I feel so close to some memories which are filling me up enough to not search for something else. I have given up on… some cravings. I may have grown old or I may be already what they call “a complete spiritual circle”?
From almost a month now, I feel I’m pulled back from my life mission. Or at least, I don’t feel that I’m growing as much as I did before. Or maybe I got used to a more thrilling way of living, due to combining work with theatre (and living in Romania – which really eats a lot of your free-time :D) and now I have too much idle time.
My serendipity brought me a brochure about the theatre plays that will be in Prague during 3-13 of November. It’s in czech and in german. 🙂 So I have what to read in the mornings in the subway, maybe I’ll finish understanding it until the plays will actually take place.
What else? Besides reflecting upon the costs of innovation, I should start creating a new plan of positive thinking, with everything ahead, into brighter horizons, but first I need to figure out what is it that really needs to be thrown into the fountain in order to be recycled. That because you cannot have positive if you don’t acknowledge where the negative really is and you have to get ride of The Old in order to have The New in your life. Easy said, hard to do. Even if I’m not in my own birth climate I cannot really say that I carry old things with me. Maybe the blog… it has become now among the oldest things that I own. Even older than the majority of the clothes I have.