Author Archives: Stefania

Baby has teeth!!

I noticed, a couple of days ago, the bottom right one was visible through the gum and now it’s completely out, I can feel it with my finger, and the left one is also visible!! Yeey!! Mom asked if she cried when they got out… Not that I know of… She was sometimes waking up screaming, in the past nights, but I thought she was having nightmares or she hurt herself on the crib margins.

On the other hand, I have a tooth ache. I went at the regular check in November and they told me barely in March they have free spots. It was hurting me for a while in summer, then it stopped, but few days ago it started again. I don’t know what to do.. wait until my appointment or go to the emergency room.. I haven’t had a tooth ache in almost 10 years and when I got here I had almost all my previous fillings re-done. I guess this is one of the remaining ones, that got demineralised during pregnancy and breastfeeding.

Another milestone of baby’s independence: today she discovered she can sit by herself! I was watching her, how she was struggling, but she had determination, she knew what she wanted and she didn’t give up! I am decided to not help her unless she ends up in a weird position that causes her pain. I was offering her my hand but she wouldn’t grab it. I never saw her so focused before, in her movements, it was scary! As if she just had another major software update. It took her few minutes the first time. She did “a demonstration” also for daddy, some minutes later. Now she can do it in 5 seconds. She is amazing!!

She just banged her head on one of the crib’s walls and she didn’t even notice.. I picked her up immediately expecting 5 min of crying! Nothing. Zero. Zilch. That’s my brave girl! Mommy’s little gymnast.

My baby is gone… Now I have a very independent, brave little girl. It makes me cry! I think this stage between 9 and 12 months is the most interesting, she is learning so many things, so fast!!

And I have to study for my ACCA exam… And UK left the EU and I’m still studying for my exam. Sometimes I think I’m crazy, I feel so tired, the lack of proper sleep in the past months is starting to leave marks. Not only on my tummy and hips. Sometimes I feel I want to throw those books into the fire-stove and pretend I never started them. I feel guilty that I’m not giving 100% of my time and energy to baby. Why have I started them in the first place!? I have paid for the exam already, so I have to go now..

Did I mention on Friday evening she fell from the couch’s bed down-stairs? I left her sitting, playing, in the bed, went for a glass of water, we had just turned back from groceries shopping. I forgot she is like running Mercury now. She cried a bit but didn’t have any signs on her head or arms.. So maybe she fell feet first. I don’t know. I was not naive, I knew that no matter how much attention you give them, they will eventually end up falling from the bed. It’s part of their learning curve. So we celebrate it!! 😀

About a week ago, she was leaning on the side of the bed, observing what is down. I showed her that she can fall and I hurt my knee in the process, I have a big bruise. Several times I demonstrated her what happens when the bed ends.

The left-over hair, from the one she was born with, it took the form of bangs and it’s now getting into her eyes. I’ve been catching them in a tiny ponytail with a tiny rubber band, but it’s added stress, I’m afraid she will pull it out one day and eat it. Or find it in the crib during the night and eat it. Or find God knows what wherever and eat it.

Hmm..  this blog post made me hungry. Or her latching for almost 1h now and not wanting to fall asleep. I thought that after such sitting-pulling-rolling marathon demonstration she would fall asleep instantly…

So yeah. I’m going out to celebrate tonight. Shopping spree in Lidl 😀 9 months inside + 9 months outside!! Yeaaay!!!

Baby has earrings!!!

She was very brave!! She cried, for like 1 minute, with big salted tears, I haven’t seen her cry like this before. It broke my heart. It was less cry than at vaccine, but it felt more intense, you could see on her face, about 10 min later, she was still sad.

But then, when I saw her with them, smiling, I fell inlove with her. I literally fell inlove with her! She hasn’t made me feel so much for her until now. She is so sweet and cute and precious and radiant… You got the point.

Mom and Dan came to visit, they were here all week, they will leave tomorrow morning. Mom worked like crazy, she spent 50% of her time cooking and the other 50% playing with baby.

After “the earrings mission”, we went to Fryda and we bought her some toys and she had a bottle of milk and she slept for 1&1/2 hours, while we did mostly window-shopping and we ate at the food court.

And at home we still had our Christmas tree, barely now they are putting in down.

After she will fall asleep, now, I’m going to study, as I have every evening for the past 2 weeks. I hope she will sleep, because, since we put her into the bigger baby bed, she keeps rolling herself on her belly, she is sleeping like this also, but we have to watch her closely to make sure she knows how to put her head to breathe properly, sometimes she just stays like that, on her belly, with the head up, gazing in the dark 😀

So yeah, that’s about it for now.

Noutăți bebelușești

S-a terminat cu joaca de-a mămicia, gata: bebe nu mai stă acolo unde o pun! O așez pe spate în vârful patului, mă duc să-mi iau un pahar cu apă și, până mă întorc, deja degustă marginea cuverturii de pe pat, pe burtică, într-un colț.

Mi-am dat eu seama la un momentdat când abia împlinise opt lunițe, că parcă, totuși, ar trebui să se rostogolească și din proprie inițiativă. Și am început training-ul. Am întărâtat-o cu o jucărie, apoi am așezat jucăria pe pat, un pic mai departe decât ar fi putut să o atingă doar întinzând mânuța în lateral. Și i-am arătat că dacă se rostogolește pe burtică, ajunge la ea imediat. Doar de atât a avut nevoie, parcă undeva în căpșorul ei doar avea nevoie de aprobare.

La două zile după, ne-am dus și i-am cumpărat pătuț nou, de la Ikea, pentru că se învățase să mai doarmă și pe o parte, iar de acum înainte se rostogolea pe burtică și dădea de pereții pătuțului de bebeluș mic-mic. Acum are loc și să se învârtă în cerc dacă are chef.

Următorul pas e să îi dau încrederea că poate să se așeze singură și în funduleț. Am ajuns la stadiul în care nu mai are nevoie decât de o mână cu care să se sprijine de mâna mea, cu cealaltă se împinge singură de jos.

Am ajuns la 3 mese pe zi:

– piure de cereale cu fructe la micul dejun sau mix de piure de fructe, în jur de 7:30-8:30, depinde la ce oră ne trezim de tot și de câte ori a păpat lăptic pe timpul nopții. Avem un mix de trei tipuri de cereale bio neprocesate, pentru bebeluși, fără zahăr, de la D&M, la care adaug o jumătate de banana pasată cu furculița, o linguriță de mascarpone și câțiva fulgi de cocos, îi place foarte mult combinația asta. Uneori mai pun și pară sau măr ras pe răzătoarea mică.

– la prânz, în jur de 11:30-12, îi dau ce fac pentru mine, dacă gătesc de la început și nu mănânc ceva semi-preparat. I-am dat supă cremă de linte cu usturoi, supă cremă de dovlecel cu ulei de dovlec, pilaf cu legume și pui, săptămâna trecută am făcut o minunăție de somon cu bulgur și dovlecei, am pus în blender și i-am dat și ei, înainte să îi pun sare și piper. Dacă nu mă simt în stare să gătesc pentru mine, îi dau mâncărică de bebeluși la borcănel, legume cu cărniță, am trecut la cele 8+, care conțin și paste sau orez și nu mai sunt așa fin blend-uite ca cele pentru “începători”. Protesta un pic la început, dar s-a obișnuit puțin câte puțin, cum să le mestece, cu cei zero dințișori pe care îi are. 😀

– la cină, în jur de 17-17:30, îi dau ce ne rămâne de la prânz sau îi mai fac mămăliguță cu iaurt sau cu brânzică. Dacă ai vedea ce față face când îi dau iaurt!! 😀

Și pe lângă astea, mai papă de vreo 4-6 ori lăptic, direct de la sursă, înainte de somnul de la 10, cel de la 13-14, culcarea se seară de după băiță și cele 2-3 ori cât se mai trezește până a doua zi la micul dejun. Azi-noapte a dormit buștean micuța de la 19 până la 5 dimineața. Poate o ține așa mai mult, că mai am și eu niște somn de recuperat, aseara la 21 dormeam și eu buștean.

Ce mai e nou? A, ieri am fost la pediatră și m-am cam “certat” cu ea, că i-am zis că bebe e cam micuță, că mi se pare mie că ar trebui să aibă cu vreo jumătate de kg mai mult și ea tot susținea că pe grafic e perfect, dar nu vedea că nu erau trecute în calculator numerele de ieri.. 😀 Tanti, la grafice cu mine nu te pui :D. Anyway, e în percentila 10 la greutate și în percentila 25 la lungime, dar e ok, să zicem, că s-a născut la percentila 25, ca lungime. Așa e ea, mai atletică. Mânca-i-aș pipinka ei de gimnastă mică în devenire 😀 😀

Am fost și am făcut programare și pentru cerceluși, cică la bebeluși așa mici nu se face deloc anestezie când se dau găurile în urechi. Cică sunt niște kit-uri, prin care se introduc direct cerceluși medicinali. Say what?! O dau eu cu Romla înainte.. mă doare sufletul să mi-o găurească pe viu.

Ce altceva… Azi dimineață i-am pus muzică clasică și se uita înspre obiectul acela magic multi-funcțional, se uita la mine, se uita iar la smart-phone (care era cu fața în jos, că na, fără ecrane pâna la doi ani) și făcea niste mutrițe de parcă ar fi fost pe deplin conștientă de cum i se modifică frecvența undelor cerebrale, mai avea un pic și chiar dansa pe ritm de vioară de Vivaldi.

De fapt am pus pentru mine, ca să mă trezesc și să mă pot concentra să înțeleg ceva din “deprecierea deductibilă pentru taxa pe profit” și din “indicele de inflație general vs specific”. Printre altele. Dar tot la Olivia și la Peter îmi era gândul. Cum, care Peter?! Mda, ăla pe care l-au scos din serial la începutul sezonului 4.

Și da. 8 lunițe și 2 săptămâni de când a văzut lumina zilei și numărăm în continuare! Sâmbătă vin în vizită mama și frati-miu, îți dai seama că noi încă avem bradul de Crăciun împodobit, poate a mai lăsat Moș Crăciun cadouri pentru bebe (și pentru mine) și la ei. 😀

Ok, ok, ACCA Financial Management Exam Kit, nu te supăra, te bag și pe tine în seamă. Am ajuns la exercițiul cu numărul 100, sunt 186 de tip A, 33 de tip B și 68 (așa multe?!) de tip C.. sper să apuc să trec prin toate până la începutul lui Martie, când e examenul. De data asta nu mă mai ambiționez așa rău, ca la F7 când am luat 83%, dacă trec F9 în Martie, chiar și cu 50% fix, sunt cea mai mulțumită. Oricum mai am și F6 și F8, pe care le-am sărit, că nu au rezonat cu mine încă.

Și s-a trezit bebe. Oops. Și-am încălecat pe-o șa și v-am spus povestea… (mai cum era?)

Parfois les petites choses peuvent devenir grandes, si tu continues à les éviter

Je ne connais pas Le Français autant que j’aimerais le savoir, parce que ça n’a jamais été une priorité pour moi..

Et je suis désolé pour ça, parce que j’aurais pu gagner beaucoup plus de choses dans la vie avec Le Français, indirectement.

Mais aujourd’hui, je n’ai même pas besoin de le savoir, car google translate peut faire tout le travail à ma place.

Je me demande si je ressentirai jamais la même chose à propos de La Tchèque, qu’est-ce que je perds maintenant en ne le sachant pas correctement?

Dois-je vraiment me bourrer d’exercices de gestion financière?! Continuer à pousser sur mes points forts et ignorer les points faibles?

Y a-t-il quelqu’un qui calcule encore la moyenne de la connaissance de tous les sujets que je possède?

Dimensions.. here we go again

If I remember correctly, some time in the autumn of 2006, I had a temporary obsession of cracking the mathematical code for winning the Romanian lottery: “6 out of 49”, by playing in Excel, with the archives of the numbers that have been extracted prior that date.

I knew that, the only thing I would need to solve it, is a graphical representation of “a 6 variables equation system“. And I also knew that, for that, I would need to understand the 6th Dimension. Have I wrote about it before? Nevermind.. And I also knew that the archive available is significantly small, compared to what I might need to make an accurate code out of it.

And then I forgot. About one year later I came across a Youtube video that was explaining what the 6th Dimension might look like.. and the 7th, 8th etc etc. And my brain stopped responding, somewhere along 😀

Then, I came to Czech Republic and then Interstellar happened and I got obsessed again. Here, the most common lotto system is “6 out of 40”, but you win something also with guessing just 3 of them and they do it two times a week and two extractions each time. I don’t know if they have archives available with the winning numbers, nor I care. Here is 20 czk to play a variant/section, which I think it’s cheaper than what it was in RO, when I left.

So, for a while, I was playing by putting all numbers from 1 to 40, split as 6 in 10 sections. (So, some would come 2 times). I won few times, by guessing the minimum 3, but the amount was just about enough to cover the cost of that ticket with 10 variants. Until I had a dream that I should not put that many lotto tickets because I’m losing my Angels. 😀 Yeah.. anyway…

Few days ago, actually in the exact day when my former colleague from the call-center died (RIP, I hope he is happy and peaceful, where he is now), I saw on his Facebook profile that he follows Fringe, so I wanted to watch the series again, now I’m about to finish Season 2.

Parallel to that, about a week ago, when I discovered on Youtube “the mandala” of the Orbit pattern between Earth and Venus, Leo showed me that joke-video when a client is asking a firm to “draw 7 red lines, from which 3 are with green ink, all perpendicular on each other. and one of them to be also in form of a kitten”. But I didn’t catch the joke. That’s because I knew, somehow in my mind, that I know how to do it…

So I started to draw it. And then I said what if I try to make a physical model, and I made a cube out of toothpicks and ginger root corners, when I was like “Oh, wait, I forgot I’m still in 3D.. ”

And then, because of an episode of Fringe, I wanted to see how a graph of a 9th degree equation might look like… Search Google “graph x^9″… now I wonder for what kids still go to school,  guess mine will have high chances to be self-schooled, as absolutely everything they would teach in school is on the Internet. And the things really worth knowing, will never be taught, right? 😀

And now I just discovered that from 20.01.2016, 18:18, my consciousness is living into the 5th Dimension, so it might not be that complicated anymore to visualise myself in the 6D. The funny part is that, now, I don’t want to win the lottery anymore (I got the paper that my parental leave allowance has been officially increased to 300k czk, so I’m fine 😀 ), now I’m just obsessed with the Math behind it.

And Quantum Physics… Even if I don’t really understand anything from it, because I never studied it.

But yeah.. Looking at this little creature next to me in bed, asking for my attention, I guess somehow, I did understand just enough, I understood the Divinity behind it. Some time, things happen, no matter how much we calculate or we don’t calculate it.

6 luni și 3 săptămâni de mămicie

Când bebe începe să te facă să râzi, mai mult decât plange ea, înseamnă că ai reușit. 🙂

În ultimele 3 luni a plâns doar la vizitele la pediatru. La 4 și la 5 luni am avut vaccin, iar la 6 luni a plâns de teamă, probabil, când s-a văzut goală, pe masa de examinat. Pediatra e foarte drăguță, calmă și răbdătoare, poate și-a adus aminte de dățile trecute, când avea vaccin.

La băiță nu a plâns niciodată. Mai plângea câteodată, în prima lună, imediat după ce o scoteam, poate îi era rece prosopul. Apoi a venit vara.. am avut nopți, în care dormeam cu geamul de la baie deschis, și tot erau 26 de grade în dormitor.

De mâncat să zicem că mâncăm cam 80-90 de grame de mâncărică (legume, orez/paste, cărniță). De câteva zile am început și o a doua masă, de piure de fructe. Aici avem și mai mult succes. Și țin să adaug ceva, acum nici nu știu cum mă mai simt în privința asta…

Îmi aduc aminte, când nici nu eram însărcinată, că susțineam sus și tare că eu o să-i gătesc în fiecare zi, nu o să-i dau mâncărică de la borcănel. Sau că o să-i dau bucăți etc etc..

Mda.. Bebe e cam mititică. Abia dublase greutatea de la naștere la 6 luni și două săptămâni, cu toate că începusem să-i dau să guste piure de legume cu o săptămămână înainte să împlinească 6 luni. Bucățele, nicio șansă de la început.

Abia acum să zicem că a reușit să înțeleagă ce e aia bucățică și ce trebuie să facă cu ea, deși fructe tot nu am curaj să-i dau bucăți. Au mare succes punguțele bio de piure de fructe, poate să le țină singură în mânuțe și știe cum să tragă din ele.

Stă destul de bine în funduleț, dacă îi dau eu mâinile să se ridice ținându-se de mine, stă 5 minute fără probleme. Pe burtică stă și câte jumătate de oră dacă are ce să facă. Încă nu se rostogolește singură, din proprie înițiativă, dar e necesar doar să o ating un pic pe lateral și apoi știe ce are de făcut.

A început să țipe. Țipăt de bucurie. Cel mai tare îmi țipă în urechi când o gâdil și mă fac că o pap de burtică. De vorbit încă nu zice m sau t, dar zice constant ne-ne-ne și ga-ghe-gu, uneori chiar ai impresia că a zis un cuvânt, deși nu am înțeles ce.

De dormit doarme foarte bine noaptea. De pe la șase săptămâni doarme 12-13 ore pe noapte, cu 2 sau 3 treziri de maxim 20 min pentru papani. Așa îi spunem noi la țiți. 😀 A avut o ușoară regresie, pe la 4 luni, când se trezea la 4:30 – 5:00 și nu mai adormea până la 8-9 și nici în timpul zilei nu prea mai dormea. Acum doarme 2 serii de câte 1.5-2 ore, dacă nu e deranjată, primul somn de pe la 9 – 9:30 și al doilea după masa de prânz.

Are o fascinație cu etichetele, dar probabil așa sunt toți bebelușii. I-am cumpărat o păpușică Elsa de pluș, îi place mult de ea, dar parcă tot eticheta e mai gustoasă.

Îi place la cumpărături și în mall. E cea mai fericită. În scoică mai plângea uneori, la început, când mergeam mai mult de 30 min fără oprire, cred că cel mai probabil din cauză că transpira. Și era și mai complicat, că cică bebelușilor mici nu ai voie să le dai apă.. așa că opream des pentru alăptat. Cred că de vreo trei ori am plecat așa pe distanțe mai mari, de două ori am făcut câte o vizită de o zi la tabăra de yoga, iar o dată am fost în Brno, pentru examenul meu.

Acum câteva zile am lăsat-o să îl mângâie pe Bonnie pe cap. Mult zis, mângâiat, ea de fapt îl trăgea de urechi. Și cățelul era așa de cuminte..

Ieri am dat-o în leagăn. Ne-a dus Leo la plimbare, circuit de testat stația de radio pe dealurile din jurul orașului, și am găsit un parc cu legănuș pentru bebeluși. La noi la Oleșna nu am dus-o încă în zona de joacă pentru copii, pentru ca mi-era teamă să nu ia vreun virus ceva. De acum încolo cred că o să o duc, că la zero grade, noaptea, nu mai rezistă virușii pe leagăne și nu mai sunt nici așa mulți copii în timpul zilei. Sper.

Iarna nu pare că vrea să vină încă, la noi sunt anunțate 10-11 grade azi, iar ieri dupa prânz, au fost chiar 15 și era soare, doar că bătea un vânt cam rece.

Atât pentru azi. Mă duc să întind rufele, cât mai doarme bebe. Și apoi poate mai am timp să mă joc un pic cu fișierele .csv, cu rezultatele parțiale de la alegerile prezidențiale. Și încet-încet ar cam trebui să mă apuc din nou de învățat, dacă vreau să dau F9 în Martie, abia am citit vreo 65% din materie, am abandonat învățatul de o lună, de când m-am apucat de campania electorală.

S-a trezit bebe. 😀 Mă duc totuși să întind rufele, cât e ocupată cu eticheta Elsei. Voiam să scriu mai multe, dar o să fac un post diferit.

It’s still a beautiful day!

God, I love you so much right now 🙂 Because you showed me, thousand years ago, things I need to know now, to express correctly how I feel and what I want to achieve.

Mercury Retrograde, in Scorpio, is currently transiting conjunct my Ascendant+Venus+Saturn. Challenging times 🙂

That’s it. Basically I only wanted to say Thank you.

Thank you for sending me on this planet exactly when and where you sent me, so I can make my difference!

“Touch me, take me to that other place /
Teach me, I know I’m not a hopeless case”

You are what you leave behind

Some say we are our thoughts, our choices or our knowledge.. Our possessions or our memories. Or our name.

From all I learned in this life so far, I believe we are what we leave behind. And I do want to leave something behind and to change the world for the better, as better as I can, day by day.

As for leaving behind, if you look at it from the cosmo perspective, we are the worst species the Earth has ever had. But that’s a different story, and you know it well, Greta can provide more details about it.

What I’m trying to write now is addressing the individual level.

The world has changed, the way we interact with eachother has changed. The generations have changed. Absolutely everything you post online may come under scrutinity and may be used against you. Each dialogue you have online can be seen and judged by many others, some will resonate with your opinion, some will not.

So, do your best each time and, with each critique you receive, you have the opportunity to learn something new and to grow. Don’t let yourself swim in the same water for years. You will end up being 60+, wrinkled and bitter. Literally.

Yeah. I received a comment in a group, that left me a bit disturbed. It’s fine, I was expecting to meet also haters. But this doesn’t mean that I also have to accept their negative energy.

But there was a part that I’d like to expand. I was argued that I write too much and I’m not “putting my shoulder to hard work”, to do something useful, aligned with the direction of the group. Among other things, that, for my own sanity, I prefered to ignore. But I am putting my shoulder to work, the intelectual one! And it’s employing much more energy than the physical one. It’s ok, the world is big enough for everyone, we don’t need to tread on each other’s toes.

I know my value. It took me a lot to learn it. I’m very creative and I cannot keep it just for myself and I do my best to wrap it in a clean form. And I also know what I still need to learn. And what I am meant to leave behind. And it’s spreading to various fields and domains. I know why I chose to be part of that group and I know that my input is appreciated by those who need it.

I also appreciate very much when somebody is showing me my mistakes on spot, but when you say I made a mistake and you don’t tell me what was it, is the opposite of what I’m doing.

What he did was not helping, it was just spreading hate. This is how I see it. And it’s fine, I don’t need to be liked by everyone. So I made him a huge favor and I blocked him. If he cannot control himself to ignore what I write, I decided to spare him the missery. Now he has more time “for his job and his family” and to employ his shoulder to do his hard work without being disturbed by my “too much” and “too correct” input (the last part I added myself, to portay also the envy I received).

Fair enough? It was clearly a dissonant encounter, why torture ourselves trying to achieve balance?! And I saw what he recently left behind also, nothing useful for me to learn from. At least not on this development path that I am now.

I do my best to be true to myself. Is not always easy, because I’m constantly being influenced by the people I love. I change and I admit it only when I want to and only if I really need to. Which makes me think, next time I will receive a disturbing comment, I will use this line: “and what did you intend to achieve with this comment?”, to save me of writing another blog post.

Another thing, saying to someone that their question is stupid or cretin is not making you score more points, on the contrary, it shows how rigid and limited You are. All opinions should be encouraged. You never know what new things you may learn.

Helping someone to learn something new – like the proper way to spell in their native language – is a good enough reason for me to continue. There are many ways to serve your country and everybody has the right to express their own opinion, as long as it stays within the limits stated by the Constitution.

And to conclude, I love this definition of Stupidity: “causing harm to yourself or to others, for no reason”. Is this an insult? Is not, if it’s the truth.

Mic drop.

In whisper, while leaving the scene: I joke only with the people I love. For everything else that doesn’t make sense, there is a block button. You should try it sometimes.

Baptism, czeched! :D

This week we had mom and dad over. I studied exactly 1 page :))

Yesterday we decided to unfreeze and clean the freezer.. We ended up turning upside down all living room and adiacent storage room.. We worked like crazy.. Now I have both the treadmill and the couch in the room. But this means I have no more desktop computer, again, no room for that anymore. And I only had it for two weeks!

Yeah, so from next week I should start running, to release the remaining baby weight. And, probably some time in the end of the next week, baby will start solids!!! This should be fun.

I felt so bad today after we came back home after the baptize. I don’t know, either I was too cold, either I ate something weird, either I developed a migraine from the hair coloring conditioner smell from last evening, either I received a “bad-eye” thing.. Mom said it was just stress getting out.

Seriously, it might be a Romanian thing but this is exactly how I felt: sudden headache, dizziness, sleepyness, nausea, mental fog.. It got better barely after the 2nd paracetamol.. I feel good enough now to be able to write this. But I still have the impression that I see with only one eye.

And I finally fell with the chair! Remember that office chair I bought few years ago, the one with wheels. I don’t remember how it ended up downstairs but lately I was using it for eating, at the big table. It was also very useful for nursing and rocking baby, because it is leaning in the back. Each time dad was seeing me leaning he was telling me that I will fall with it… When they left after the visit in Spring, somehow the chair got blocked, it was not possible to lean back with it. But last week Leo finally understood what I was complaining about and he managed to unlock it.

On Wednesday at 9 am I almost broke my left arm… When I fell, somehow the left arm got trapped behind it.. It hurted horribly, I almost fainted. I asked mom to give baby a bottle of formula because I didn’t see myself capable of nursing, I rubbed Voltarene on the area around the wound which was a carpet burn and kept ice on it for 2 hours.. I was afraid I broke it. I could’ve broken my head on the pantry door, I missed only by few centimeters, I hurted my elbow though..

And then, from that night, a throat pain started.. I ate 5 or 6 Isla pills and it stopped.. I hope they are breastfeeding compatible, I forgot to check, and they are working better than Strepsils.

Now, an interesting thing about the baptize: the Godmother’s name is the same as the baby’s name!! I must’ve known this but then I forgot.. I knew well the Godfather, but I only had seen her before only one time, several years ago. They are expecting their 3rd. Brave. And another fun thing: apparently the baby needed a Patron name, aside from her first name.. And this is how my baby ended up having exactly the same two names that I wanted in the first place. And they’re both secret. 😀

And! I almost forgot, another very good thing that happened this week: I got my result from the F7 exam: 83%!!!! I couldn’t believe my eyes! My best result in the ACCA exams so far. So, I guess this means to be studying properly. I’m now more than half in the study for F9, but I don’t have the same appetite.. I think I will postpone this one for March session. The Sun is transiting my 12th House, this is my time to rest… mentally. I kinda need it.

Stay tuned, coming soon with the blog post en français!

Later edit: remember that little ring I was having on the back of the phone, to be able to scroll Facebook with one hand while breastfeeding? Yeah, I broke it. Wednesday or Thursday, don’t remember exactly. Lucky I had 2 more. Yeah, I managed to break a 2nd one, exactly the same way, just the day after… It’s like they have some expiration date or something…

About investing in your child

I always heard and still hear or read about this, mostly from parents with a more than decent financial position, mostly, probably, trying to show that they care. If I ever said or wrote about it myself, well, I changed my mind.

Last night I did an important step in my life, which brought me some small revelations. Small step for the world, but a big one for me, personally. I will probably write about it with a later occasion.

So.. investing in a child. In the child’s education. Starting with private kindergarten and ending with college abroad. Sounds fancy, but it’s wrong. You know why? Because an investment implies a certain amount of return. What kind of return are you expecting from your child? A very good job in the future? Will you expect to benefit from this job also, as a parent? Having a decent life after retirement is your job, not theirs.

You know, we Romanian have a saying “make a child to have someone to bring you a glass of water when you are old”. I don’t resonate with this. I don’t expect my daughter to bring me a glass of water when I am old, because she will have her own babies to nurse. I believe is not fair for the kid to add such a big responsibility on their shoulders.

The times have changed. In the developed countries people can decide (more or less) when to have kids. I’m not including here the cases when the child was conceived by accident or without consent. I am talking about a planned and wanted child. Nowadays kids are not made like on a factory line, to be employed from a young age, to help at the farm. Except from cases when parents belong to some movement or cult, in the developed countries the families usually have 1 or 2 kids, enough to have the means to raise them healthy and properly educated.

Anyway, you got the point. So, saying that you invest in your child shows egoism. You can invest in yourself, by taking post-graduate classes or arts or whatever, because it’s you and it’s about you and you are capable enough to understand the responsibility. You know that you expect a promotion after those classes or a change of career. I mean, you can sure put them in private kindergarten, raise them multi-lingual, send them to college abroad, but don’t take it as an investment.

One of the things that left me disturbed from my childhood years is that I never knew (in advance) what are the expectations, but I was qualified as “needs improvement”. In the exceptional cases. In the usual cases I was called plain “not good of anything”. What can this mean? That the investment return was negative? How miserable must be the life of that parent to be capable of calling a child like this..

In conclusion, raising and educating a child should be unconditional. I’m not feeding and entertaining my child as an investment. There might be one small exception on this: health. Especially dental, which is the most expensive to treat. Considering that, until certain age, I will have to pay for the dental care, I might consider an investment a proper hygiene routine and regular preventive checks. But the child will know what is expected from them: to brush their teeth at least 2 times a day, floss at least one time a week, just like their parents do, nowadays.

Also, is much more than egoism to expect from the child more than you expect from yourself, solely because you provided them with much better learning conditions than what you had. Ok, ok, our parents and our grand-parents from the little they had they decided to “invest” in the kids. They did a small mistake. They should have invested in themselves. And let the child decide (age appropriate) if and how much they want to invest in themselves. You, as a parent, except from seeing your child healthy and happy, should not expect anything else.

Just that, too often, parents push kids too much and forget what their job as a parent really is about: just to love them, always, unconditional and no matter what. Everything else is an illusion.